Amassing Comments and Poo Poo Paper

Clamhead is the master of the comments. I am happy for her. The stink is that I lovingly built the system she uses to blog (which I use as well). I feel like Tom Petty when the “Stop Draggin My Heart Around” single was vastly more successful than anything the Heartbreakers had done up until that time.

So I asked Stevie, “What am I doing wrong to solicit such a mass of resposes?” She gave some suggestions, but I think the main problem is she has a wicked huge fan base (with good reason). Of her many suggestions this was one: find common ground. In the sample of hers shown in the link, she appeals to childhood memories; a memory that we all share. So I have been racking my noodle for such a topic and this weekend I was struck with inspiration.

While at my mom’s house, I used restroom…like you do. (Please read on. I assure you there is nothing graphic in the following text.) I chuckled at the toilet paper roll as my mother ALWAYS has the paper rolling under (so the required paper dispenses from the bottom of the roll). I chucked because as a child, this drove me to the brink of madness. When I replaced the rolls growing up I always put them on so that the roll would “roll over” rather than under (thus dispensing itself from the top).

I can’t understand why anyone would want it to roll under. When my mom found rolls I replaced she would spin then around. Upon finding my revised rolls, little 11-year-old Lordleiter would raise his tiny fists to the heavens screaming, “KAAAAAAAAHHHHHN!” It was my Dickey Moe.

Looking back (and at the present), I can think of no reasons to support my preference. Is there no advantage to have the paper roll over? Am I only now discovering yet another of my growing collection of neurosis. For no good reason, it seems, I abhor the thought of having to deal with under-rolling TP.


  1. Starlight on 22 December 2003 at 10:28 am

    under under under!!! if you’ve ever had to share the bathroom with a two year old toddler you would understand the vast convenience of the tp being under. toddlers find great joy in hitting the tp until the entire roll is sitting on the floor. but of course you amazingly dont discover that until you reach for the empty cardboard…

    there i’ve made my case for under… despite being heavily outnumbered.!

  2. Erica on 22 December 2003 at 1:43 am

    I also hate the tp that rolls under and it was everything I could do last week at my sister’s not to flip her roll over…I guess tp preference isn’t at all genetic.

  3. Lordleiter on 23 December 2003 at 2:32 am

    Thank Jack Lord for a plea to under. I was beginning to wonder if my common ground was perhaps too common.

  4. shemaiah on 22 December 2003 at 3:53 am

    So sad that our most common human experiences that we are willing to talk about have to do with pooing, isn’t it?

    YOu know I’ve actually never noticed which way I place the roll on it’s holder…this is quite odd for I am a first born, anal, and tidy beyond belief.

  5. shemaiah on 22 December 2003 at 3:55 am

    By the way, I am so happy that you have discovered the glory that is David Serdaris. Besides the whole getting married thing, Serdaris is one of the best things that happened to me in the last two years.

  6. Miranda on 22 December 2003 at 5:24 am

    Ahh. My love for you is always growing. I too am obsessed with the roll-over and have derrived much joy from our many years together without ever having to turn the paper over. (And just for the record, I too have flipped the roll at your mom’s house.)

  7. mia on 22 December 2003 at 5:40 am

    over the top makes the end convenient to find!

    And I agree that Sedaris rules. Holidays on Ice is a quick read, so you’ll need more soon. Not to discourage consumerism, but I am happy to lend you the books that I have as well. I’m starting a Blogger Book Exchange and have been trading books via mail with other bloggers…I’m happy to put you on the list! Just email me your address. 🙂

  8. shemaiah on 22 December 2003 at 5:57 am

    I’ll offer you the same. I have so many books and it makes me feel better to have people borrow them. YOur wife is a member of my library as she has one of my Jane Austen books. I have most of Sedaris’ other books. Next time we see one another, I’d be happy to slide a new book your way.

  9. Keri on 22 December 2003 at 7:29 am

    OVER OVER OVER. I don’t want the paper sliding down a nasty, germ-infected wall before I… well. Not to say your wall is nasty and germ-infected. But the wall is next to the toilet, so… ah, never mind.

    And I like Sedaris, but found that I enjoy listening to him more than I enjoy reading him.

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