A sequel you ask? If you are a faithful lordleiter.com reader from the waybacks, you may remember this old chestnut:
Events on the Drive Home (30 October 2003)
And it seems only fitting that four years later I spin another yarn from the crosswalk.
My wife, Miranda Kopfschmertzen and I were driving home after seeing Sherman Alexie speak at the university. (He was hilarious. I highly recommend seeing him or reading him if you get the chance.) Cruising down the coast we come to a stop light. The red hand turns into a white man walking and the pedestrians begin their crossing.
First was a dude in a wheelchair who was powering his chair not by rotating the wheels with his hands or motors, but by pulling himself forward with his lower legs – kind of like walking…but while in a chair. Did he need the chair?
He was closely followed by a short guy who wanted so badly to be a rapper on MTV but only succeeding in being a shoddy stereotype. (When did tucking your ears into your hat become cool? Last time I checked that was a clear indicator of dorkdome and justified immediate taunting and playground ridicule.) He also carried a boom box playing some sort of pump-up music. I believe the kids refer to these as “beats.”
Both the not-a-plegic and Kid KrossWalk were moving in time to the music. And they took their sweet time moving the length of the crosswalk.
Best I can figure is that the guy in the wheelchair was some kind of all-powerful urban mystic and the runt was his back-up music lackey. Or maybe he’s the Secretary of Beats.