T-mobile has the worst automated answering service ever (as indicated by the title of this piece). They are trying to do away with the old fangled push button method (“Press 1 to have $8 in service charges added to your bill. Press 2 to have your social security number emailed to millions…”). Instead they are employing the high-tech voice-recognition system. Here is how the “conversation” went:
T-mobile: Thank you for calling T-moblie. What is the nature of your call? You may say anything from “my phone isn’t working” to “I have questions about my account.”
Me: … (Put off that I was talking to a machine, I only made madface.)
T-mobile: Did you say you would like to hear about our “Walk and Talk” service? Yes or no.
Me: NO! Put someone on the line.
T-mobile: What is the nature of your call? You may say anything from “my phone isn’t working” to “I have questions about my account.”
Me: Oh for Christ’s sake, please put someone on.
T-mobile: You have indicated that you are having trouble with your phone. It is recommended that if your phone is not working, you should call the help number from a different phone. What model phone to you currently own?
Me: Eat my balls.
T-mobile: Thank you, I will now transfer you to an operator.
Real Person: Thank you for calling T-mobile, may I have your name please?
Me: Lordleiter.
Real Person: And what is the nature of your call?
Me: … (More madface)
Real Person: Sir?
Me: Your automated system doesn’t work very well. (Not my reason for calling, but now my central concern.)
Real Person: I’m sorry, what automated system?
Me: I’d like to speak with Catherine Zeta-Jones, please.