Events on the Drive Home

I drove home last night; hilarity ensued.

First, I saw a couch cushion in the middle of the road. I have never given much thought to this before, but could you imagine? You are gleefully driving back to you pad after scoring a free couch from a benevolent relative. Unbeknownst to you, during the drive, one single cushion makes it bid for salvation. When you get home to dawn your new-to-you sitting duds, you realize that there is one cushion missing. What do you do with a couch that has one cushion missing.

Then, as I was pondering how one might craft a makeshift cushion out of household items, I witnessed this: I was at a stop light and the traffic in the opposite direction had just been given the go ahead which included the cross-walks as there were pedestrians on both sides of the intersection wishing to cross the street. The person on the left side of the street was a curvaceous lady in a questionable outfit. The person on the right side was a blind man complete with white cane and sun glasses. At the crucial moment as the two were passing each other in the cross-walk the blind guy yelled, “HEY, BABY!” to the voluptuous woman. So, I am thinking either the dude is not blind and he is running a silly scam to pick up women, or his blindness has caused his other sensory inputs to become hyper-sensitive and he can hear the difference between a woman walking around in a blouse and a woman jostling around in a tube top. Either way, I laughed.


  1. Mia on 30 October 2003 at 11:26 am

    man. my commute is boring.

    Oh, and the guy from Singles is Matt Dillon. You wrote Kevin. Just an FYI 😉

  2. Frou von Ferstenburg on 30 October 2003 at 2:28 am

    Will you be dressing up at work for Halloween tomorrow??

  3. shemaiah on 30 October 2003 at 4:11 am

    That’s great stuff! I love watching the strange events of the world right outside our windows. By the way, my friend, Melissa says that it looks like the strikers are having a great time hanging outside of the stores. She saw some of them chatting with a group of people without signs. They were still there when she returned from her errand. It was as if they invited some of their non-union friends to just hang out and party with them in the parking lot. I thought of you when she told me this.

  4. Keri on 30 October 2003 at 5:21 am

    I always wonder about those single shoes along the side of the road. How often does one lose a shoe while driving?
    “Windshield wipers… slapping out a tempo… Keeping perfect rhythm with the song on the ra – HEY! My SHOE!”

  5. Miranda on 30 October 2003 at 6:18 am

    Happy 10 years of movies, ice cream (that you never eat unless it is B&J’s Coffee Heath Toffee), popcorn (that I say I don’t want and then eat all of), Python, fluffy tails, paws, Beatles, and softies. I love you.

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